So many articles, stories and words of advice are out there telling you, teaching you and helping you to stand up for yourself to others and just say NO.
Say no to things you don’t want to do, projects that don’t interest you, tasks (or belongings) that don’t help you grow or bring you joy. Say no to being overlooked and passed up for a promotion. Say no to people in your life that bring you down.
This is all great advice and super important to learn and incorporate into your life. However, I also think it’s important to say YES…to yourself.
Everything and everyone you say “no” to is external to you. You are basically protecting yourself from negativity. However, on the flip side, let’s ask these questions;
- Are you allowing yourself the positive?
- Are you letting in all those things that could help you?
- Are you giving yourself the chance to try new things, to push yourself?
If your answers to those questions is also “no”, then that needs to change.
Start to say yes to yourself. Yes to new jobs, new experiences, new friends, and new relationships.
For every “no” to protect yourself, there should be a resounding YES to challenge yourself.
If you say “no” to tasks that aren’t beneficial or drag you down, there should be a “hell yes” for activities that bring you the excitement and growth you want.
Do you get my point here?
If you say no to protect yourself from the bad, but don’t let in any good, then what are you doing? Isn’t the whole point of “no” to others to be able to say “yes” to you?
I feel like anyone who’s not at the point of saying “yes” is held back by fear and uncertainty. Or, you’re also just out of practice.
Saying yes to yourself is a big part of work/life balance, self care and putting yourself first. As professional women, though, this is difficult. We’re taught to put everything else first. I know I’ve felt guilty in the past when I decided to do something solely for me. It can also be scary to say yes to taking chances and trying something new.
Everyone’s routine and journey is different. So, all I can say is: baby steps. Start saying yes to small things. Get used to saying it, thinking it and find your confidence in it, then move up from there.
Some strategies to get you going and thinking about what to say yes to:
Keep a journal – sometimes writing things down has a way of showing us what we want more than anything else.
Make a list of everything you’d like to do. Whether this is a bucket list or a list of career goals, or personal aspirations and things to try, keeping a tally of what you desire is a sure-fire way to motivate yourself to make it happen.
Speak it into existence. My friend once told me that if you believe in something and truly want it and you say it out loud and present it to the universe, then universe will make it happen. I’ve done this in the past with success as well.
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You have control over how you spend your time; so make sure that you give yourself permission to spend some part of it solely for you.
Featured and pinnable image courtesy of Unsplash.com